I hope I didn't offend you

I hope I didn't offend you
(Phrases with offend, offensive, offence)

A word that came up recently in one of my lessons was offence. I told 2 of my students that I didn't like J-pops (Japanese pop music) very much. I told them that to me, a lot of it sounds the same. Then I added: "Sorry, I don't mean any offence by that."
They gave me a strange look and one of them asked, "Offence? What is that?"
"Oh, sorry," I said. "I mean I hope you're not hurt or angry because I said I didn't like J-pops."
"No, not at all," they said. Then one of them said, "I know offence in basketball, but I don't understand what you mean by offence now."

NOTE:
Offence with -ce is British English; the American spelling is offense.

The meaning of offence / offend / offensive

If we offend somebody, it means that we have made them angry because we have said something rude （失礼）, or something that makes them feel hurt. For example, if somebody said something to me like, "All British people are___" followed by something negative, I think I might feel offended.

I think that offend / offence / offensive are a useful family of words to know about. In last week's one point lesson, we looked at techniques for asking sensitive questions. Sometimes, we might say things to people that could make them feel hurt or unhappy. If we think that people might be hurt by something we say, we can soften it by phrases like these:

I don't want to offend you, but could you please check your spelling before you hand in your next report?
I'm not trying to offend you, but I think you need to practice a little bit more before you sing in public.
I don't mean any offence, but aren't you a little old for this type of job?
Please don't be offended, but sometimes you remind me of Mr Bean.

If we say realize that we might have said something hurtful to someone, we might quickly add a phrase like:

Sorry, I hope I didn't offend you by what I said at the meeting.
You're not offended are you?
Sorry, I didn't mean to be offensive.
No offence intended.

Some useful phrases and collocations

OFFEND

I don't mean to / want to / intend to offend you, but...
I'm not trying to offend you, but...
I'm sorry, but have I done something to offend you?

OFFENSIVE

I don't want to seem / sound / be offensive, but...
I'm sorry if I seemed / sounded / was offensive.

Offensive can often be found with nouns like remark, comment, behaviour, language:

He got drunk and made some very offensive remarks about the mayor's wife last night.
I found some of his comments very offensive.
(From a TV announcer). We would like to warn you that this programme contains language which some viewers might find offensive.

OFFENCE

I don't mean / intend any offence when I say this, but...
Please don't take offence, but...
No offence intended, but...
No offence, but...

Sometimes, the phrase "No offence (intended)" can be responded to with "None taken" or "No offence taken."

A: Sorry about what I just said. No offence intended.
B: That's OK. No offence taken.

Exercise

Use offend / offended / offence / offensive to fill in the blanks below:

I want to apologise for any _________ I may have caused.
The boss has been a bit cold towards me recently. Do you think I've said something to _________ her.
I'm sorry if I said anything _________ .
I'm sorry. I didn't mean to say anything to _________ you.
No _________ intended, but would you mind not putting your feet on the furniture.
I think that some of the comments he made were very _________ to black people.
A lot of women are likely to be _________ by his comments.

When you've finished, click here to check your answers.

Click below if you want to try some of my other one-point lessons:
Bob's One-Point Weekly Lesson Archive.